Monday, August 31, 2009

So diappointed...

I admit I'm not a dancer.

Never in my life have I attempted to prance or twirl as much as I did in the past one week. My thighs hurt soooo bad I can barely walk down the stairs.

Yet after so much hard work, my dancing doesn't seem to be getting any better. I reviewed my dance just now, and it totally sucks!!!

Hours and hours of working myself to the bone... AND IT STILL SUCKS!!!!!!!!

OMG.... can someone just kill me...

Sunday, August 16, 2009

Where Do We All Go From Here?

I've always had a soft spot for the song 'Graduation' by Vitamin C. Everytime I listen to it, it just brings back memories of my undredged childhood. Reminiscing about the time that passed me by, how those experiences are what they are, just memories in the deluge of my past.

Sometimes I look around at my friends, and I wonder. Where will we be 10 years from now?

Will we still be friends?

Will we still laugh at the same jokes, eat at the same table, share the same secrets?

Can we?

The experience of life lies within the unknown, but it is so hard to comprehend that all you hold dear to you now, may cease to exist within the blink of an eye.

Perpetualilty embeds itself in those that resist change, and with it trails the footsteps of their demise.

At times, I have to resist the urge to tell everyone around me how much I love them, because nothing is everlasting. Eventually, we will lead our own lives and follow our own paths. Our destinies may not entwine together, yet our journey significantly crosses roads.

Companions at a certain point, till death or sickness robs us of our ability to recollect, we are conjoined by the truth of time we spent together.

Most of us live in the future, or dwell within the past. How many are able to exist in the moment, the present, and cherish all that is around you.

Maybe in the next 10 years, we will be all over the world. We won't recognise each other as we pass each other by on the street. Maybe our jokes won't be funny, out lives uneventful, our problems so choking it seems to rob us of any social semblance.

Maybe, we won't be friends.

However the end may be, the present will still always exist. So as we continue on this personal journey we share with many others, just take some time off to stop thinking about your destination or the path you just followed. Take some time to look around, and stare into the eyes of those holding your hand when you stumble.

Nothing in this world ever lasts. So live it and appreciate it for what it is today.

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Sigh... It's inevitable that this blog is turning into a darker shade of gloom with every post. Compared to my previous blog(s), this one has to top the list for being the least cheerful and most sincere.

I'm a very funny person. Not funny as in haha-laugh out loud 'funny', but 'funny' as in weird, unpredictable, castoff 'funny'. I don't know, maybe it's my genes. Maybe I take after my mom.

Anyway... Sometimes I feel life doesn't work out the way I expect it to be, which is fine! I get it. Life is unfair, life is a challenge waiting to be unearthed, life progresses within the expectant and dies within the faithless.

Disenchanted. Yes, that's the word! It's okay to not have everything in life, to not succeed in everything you do. But to this extent?!

Whatever. I'm fed up anyway.

Lemme tell you something. I'm just as good as the next person. I have a pair of arms, a pair of legs, a pair of eyes and perfectly good hands. I can do anything you can do. Maybe even better!

You are obviously under no qualification to determine what I should or should NOT be doing. Hell, wasting manpower is the worst waste of resources EVER!

Leaders do NOT allow useful hands to go to waste. Leaders do NOT expend the time of others while leaving them in the dark in spite of their duty. Leaders do NOT, and I repeat, do NOT!! delegate nothing to people that can obviously contribute much.

I know I'm not perfect, nor am I preaching so. All I'm asking is, put me to a task, and let me accomplish it. Don't pull the mat out from under me. It's unfair and a total waste of time and energy.


Sunday, August 9, 2009

Heh. I've been getting quite comfortable writing stuff on my blog, since no one ever looks at it anyway, and it's a chance for me to practice jotting down my thoughts (which are all OVER the place recently).

Today, I'm going to talk about life.

For decades upon millenia, religion has been classifying life as a sacred vessel set upon the forces of divinity that exists solely to serve a higher purpose, or God, for that matter. Religion believes in souls, redemption and ultimately eternal existance. Which means, as people die, their essence is channeled to a vortex of mortal worship where they simply exist, and 'be'. Obviously, no accurate personal experiences of this netherregion has ever been accepted, albeit many have been reported.

Why is that so?

This brings us back to science. Science decodes life as "The property or quality that distinguishes living organisms from dead organisms and inanimate matter, manifested in functions such as metabolism, growth, reproduction, and response to stimuli or adaptation to the environment originating from within the organism." In layman's terms, if you move, you live.

Now, I'm not a biologist with fancy titles and glossy certificates hung over my wall. But I can tell you this. WE ARE NOT SPECIAL.

Everytime I google 'meaning of life', I get links to philosophical sites claiming and/or guiding and/or dismissing the minute arbitraries of life. What is our purpose on this earth? Is there a God? Why are we here?

Our brain is a very powerful organ, to describe it lightly. Launching nuclear warheads, commiting acts of detestable violence, decimating an entire planet into near smithereens just through consumer consumption... our brains? Been there, done that. The human brain itself is capable of creating dastardly brilliant devices, fit for the continual survival of its host's body. Invent a global system of interconnected computer networks that allow rapid (in milliseconds) transfer of information across two opposite poles of the planet? Check. An explosive device with the ability to exterminate 70% of the world's population if launched simultaneously, that obtains its destructive properties from the fission or fusion of minute atoms? Check. What else? Pollution? Check. Global warming? Check too.

You see?

We are not special. There is nothing enlightening about the human race. We weren't a breakthrough in the Creation of Earth.

We are just a quirk in the evolutionary line. While whales got enlarged hearts and lungs, elephants have gigantic front teeth, us humans obtained an engorged cranial organ.

Does this warrant us interspecies bigots to channel the aura of the priviledged? Who are we to decimate the simplicity of life, with narcissistic tendencies. If we have souls, so do the thousands of lives we each take away everyday. The ant you stepped on, the chicken you just ate, the weed you just poisoned.

So think about it. Are we any different from the other lifeforms on this planet? Do we necessarily have a pupose in life? Bottom line, we think of ourselves too highly. Oftentimes slogans such as " Only we (meaning humans) have the power to save the earth/ monkeys/ donkeys/ whatever species require saving/ corporate giants" subliminally appear in the various media forms.

Perhaps we should start saving the world from ourselves.

Friday, August 7, 2009

What a horrible week!

Today during physiology class, we learnt about the female reproductive system, with its follicles and luteums in all its glory.

I'm sorry to say this, but am I glad I'm a guy!

I can't stand to have bodily fluids of assorted colours, clarity and VISCOSITY (OMG!!!!) coming out of me every month. I'm not masochistic. I just have a weak stomach.

Now, obviously menstruation follows a monthly cycle of... I dunno... 28 days? (Although if you think about it, you'll come short at the end of the year and have an extra cycle to boot! ARGH, DAMMIT!) And during this time, women will experience various cravings, mood swings and, if I may say so myself, preference.

But that is not the point.

The point I am trying to come to is the PMS, or pre-menstrual symptom that some (and I say that VERY LIGHTLY... IF NOT 'ALL') women experience. Oh, you'll know it when they come to. All the bitching, and/or flirting, sudden exhiliration and then deep depression. Rudeness, being obnoxious, less regard for people's feelings, feminism... THE LIST GOES ON!

My point is, guys do have that too. Again, I apologize, but yes, guys do experience some PMSyndrome, although in their case it's not 'PRE-MENSTRUAL' exactly, more like a mood swing, since men don't menstruate (that would be silly), but can be characterized in a somewhat similar fashion. You get my drift.

Which leads us back to where this post is going to.


Maybe it's hormones, maybe my bipolar disorder is acting up again. Basically I felt rotten, absolutely ROTTEN, I tell ya!

For the past five days, I have been trudging in to classes, so drained of life, feeling lethargic and anaemic (just a metaphor). Sometimes being quite rude to my friends, having no interest in lessons AT ALL, and just feeling sooooo tired.

I dunno. Maybe it's just a bad week. Or maybe.... a huge comet that would obliterate the entire human race is heading straight to earth, emitting radioactive frequencies so devastating all satellites are knocked out and oblivious to its presence. Only my highly tuned extra seventh sensory organ is sensitive enough to pick up the coment's vibes, and interpret the impending doom of Man.

But I beg to differ.